Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Scared of robots? You should be!

Just in case you're not up to speed with the state of robotics these days, here are a couple of vids outlining some of the recent benchmarks reached by Boston Dynamics. The company is funded by Darpa, the Defence Advanced Research Projects Agency of the US Department of Defence.

This robot is apparently designed to throw 5kg ashbrick blocks at you...

And this one, called Big Dog, is more geared to hunting you down over any terrain, no matter if you try kick it over or whatever! The nerds are laughing, but their evil, wiry progeny are coming to murder us!

Imagine this thing, the Legged Squad Support System hunting you down while you run wild-eyed through the undergrowth screaming like a little bitch...

Think you can outrun the bastards? You can't. This version of the Cheetah robot last year broke its speed record by hitting 28,3mph. That's 46km/h, Dudey-Shoes, and a lot faster than you're capable of sprinting in your wildest Asafa Powell-dreams.

Just for extra fear, hear's a creepy little Sand Flea robot that can jump tall buildings in a single standing vault, crawl into tiny confined spaces, and makes a horrific hissing sound like a mix between a rattlesnake and a Parktown Prawn to boot. No doubt about it, peeps, when the rise of the machines happens, we are super, super fucked.

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